Random News Blips: Hot Water, Warm Pee, Cold Germs
2671 Reads
"Hot Coffee":
Public Enemy Number One
Tracking these blips:
Not content (or willing) to investigate bad businesses or prosecute evil landlords, City Attorney Rocky Delgadillo is focusing on what really affects L.A.'s peace and security: Video games about a fictitious Los Angeles.
(BTW, did you know that the CA's full first name is "Rockard?" Cue Beavis snickers ...)
Matt Welchpeed in a cup for the privilege of telling L.A. Times readers about the experience a few weeks later. Been there, done that - though I never got to write about it until now, and certainly could never do so with such self-deprecating panache as Matt ...
Tell me the Daily News photo staff didn't Photoshop the living bejesus out of this West Hills sidewalk to burn-in the shadows and make it look even more sinister for a snooze-inducing story about "[a] 7-month-old program that lets Los Angeles homeowners split the cost of sidewalk repair with City Hall ..."
An outbreak of avian flu in L.A. would activate the germ police, who could break up public gatherings, cancel school plays, eject sick people from malls and make everyone wear masks, according to the Daily News' Jillian O'Connor, who is pretty damn witty on the subject. I'm betting this whole "social-distancing" quarantine scenario come as a massive shock to most of us, who couldn't be bothered to read the California response plan for influenza outbreaks because we're too busy riding a crowded subway to the hockey game despite our nasty hacking coughs. But there it is. All 84 pages of it.
Memo to the counterfeiters: It wasn't that you stuffed four bogus $100 bills down a lap-dancer's G-string. It was that you soaked 'em in vinegar first. Next time, try coffee - which is equally suspicious to federal police dogs, but maybe not so much to strippers.
'Scuse me. Coffee's getting cold.
Posted by: Mack_Reed on Sunday, January 29, 2006 - 11:27 PM